I think I better think it out Again

I was talking today with a friend about Values and what people see as success
my friend very wisely pointed out that success inst about money cars or high powered jobs and I very much agree with her
This conversation lead to me opening up about myself and how becoming ill made me have to take a look at my life , success and my views of myself
As ive mentioned I am a Sober Recovering Alcoholic , I have never been a particularly intelligent women ( as in book smarts) I didn't do well at school and just wanted to drink life away, so when I got sober I somehow planted it in my head that my life goal was to be a mother
Long story made sort I was soon to find out that I have problems and may never conceive a child , due to being a troubled teen and getting in trouble with the law I doubt very much I could adopt and on top of it all I fell in love with a Much older man with a past of his own.
I felt very much like I wasn't a real woman for some time when I found out having children may not be something I can do and probably wasn't my calling
Rather than dealing with this loss I simple gave myself a new lifes goal, something else that would my life worth while and a overall success would be to have a job worth showing off , to be proud of I felt I could feel good about my life with a good career
I Studied hard , worked far to much and on more than one occasion burned out to get myself into a career I could be proud of  being able to say I am the manager of a drug and alcohol rehab , having business card I could hand out ect did make me feel good and I honestly thought the only way from there was up , to beat it all I was getting married what a success my life was!
 Then came alot of stress alot of pain and illness ,
 I had to quit working and eventually had to except that work may not be part of my future
I think the biggest emotional blow from this illness was that , I had wrongly placed my self worth on what I did for a living  and now it was gone and I wont be working for some time .... if ever ., so what was I if I wasn't a Manager .....?
I am  A wife but I not the house wife type and u unable to be if if i had wanted as I get tired out so easy
I spent alot of time crying and trying desperately to pull some self asteam together , It can still haunt me from time to time but for now im more comfortable to just be me , know I am a fighter  and will get through this with self respect if nothing else , I also have to respect that I cannot see my futcher I do not know whats coming my way and that it doesn't take children or a good sounding job to make a woman or man whole but looking in the mirror and knowing your own worth